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DEEP COACHING CASE STUDY

From Deep Coaching: Using the Enneagram as a Catalyst for Profound Change, by Roxanne Howe-Murphy, Ed.D. (Enneagram Press, 2007)

Julie came to coaching providing the following information about herself:

My work has taken over my life. My expectations of myself far surpass my boss's expectation of me. I often experience high levels of negative stress and anxiety, and I feel that I can never catch up with all the details that have to be taken care of. My perfectionism is a driving force in my life.

Julie held a lot of tension in her body. She complained of having a lot of pain in her back and throughout the rest of her body. She was very friendly, but had difficulty maintaining eye contact.

Her goals for coaching included:

1. Living a more balanced life;

2. Lowering her expectations of herself and developing a more realistic perspective of the relationship between work and life;

3. Making room for and to develop stronger relationships with friends;

4. Living life with more purpose, fulfillment, and inner peace.

When Julie discovered that she had a Type Once personality, she reported that she recognized the following long-time patterns:

A. I have a heavy and constant sense of being personally obligated. The more stressed she was, the greater her sense of being the only responsible person. "If I don't fix it, who will?"

B. I feel angry and resentful for not living up to my own expectations. And I am angry when others don't live up to my expectations of them as well. Although I can go into rage pretty easily, most of the time I hold it in check because I don't know what would happen if I allowed myself to really let loose.

C. Feeling compelled to accomplish a lot, to get it all done right, and to continually make progress toward fulfilling her mission.

As Julie expanded her capacity for observing her internal patterns, she saw how frustration, and her inner critic, ran rampart over her inner world as she interacted with colleagues, subordinates at work, and customers. She created games to catch the messages of her inner critic, and noticed how the messages would contradict themselves. She journaled her thoughts and became more aware of her feelings. She started getting regular massages and other forms of bodywork to help her release her physical tension. She signed up for yoga and meditation classes.

One major theme of her coaching fieldwork centered around being present and inviting in all of her uncomfortable feelings. She found that when she used her breath to stay present to her feelings, that they would transform and would yield to a more expansive experience.

At work, when she was the consequences of some of her patterns, she made conscious decisions to make changes. Rather than continuing to try and do everything on her own, she asked for help, and received it. She received approval to hire staff who could be responsible for aspects of her work that created the highest level of stress for her. She eventually cut back on her work hours to create time for personal interests.

She challenged herself when she recognized patterns that held her back from what she really wanted-to make a significant contribution to the lives of others. And she practiced self-acceptance of her patterns, even those that had caused her the most suffering. She created more room for allowing herself to accept whatever came up for her. With every step, she became more in tune with her calling-to live a purposeful life that would make a difference.

She discovered that she wanted to work with other people to help them live purposefullives, an awareness that wasn't on her radar screen when she started being coached. She enrolled in a certificate program that would allow her to fulfill her dream, and continue with her own personal development. She created a business.

In the meantime, her physical appearance softened and she showed her inner strength beautifully through her vulnerability.